Breaking the Cycle of Violence

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Breaking the Cycle of Violence

Getting out of a violent or abusive relationship can be very difficult. The cycle of violence includes a “making up” and “calming” period, during which the abuser can be very loving, may give gifts and pretend the abuse never happened. These actions don’t erase the fact the abuse happened. And abuse is never a one-time thing.

So the first step in changing things is to understand that what's been happening to you is wrong. Even if the abuser says they care about you, it's NOT OK to be treated like this.

There are resources available to help you get out of the situation, whether you are being abused by a parent, spouse, boyfriend/girlfriend, or even a grown child.

Call one of these free, anonymous hotlines:

  • National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) offers highly-trained advocates 24/7/365 to talk confidentially with anyone experiencing domestic violence, seeking resources or information, or questioning unhealthy aspects of their relationship.
  • Your Life Your Voice is a national hotline for kids, teens and young adults who may be depressed, contemplating suicide, being physically or sexually abused, on the run, addicted, threatened by gang violence, fighting with a friend or parent, or faced with an overwhelming challenge.

There are many people and services that can help. Just talking to someone you trust about your concerns can help you see your options more clearly. Please visit our Crisis & Support page for information on local programs and resource that can help you keep safe.

Many articles in this section were adapted from, a website for Native Youth by Native Youth